It’s not surprising that many married couples would love to stop arguing in their marriages. As the owner of Foundations Coaching in Cary, I help my clients communicate better in order to avoid arguments. To that end, I have found that there are a few strategic ways all couples can master so they can avoid conflict and prevent arguments.
4 effective ways to avoid unnecessary conflict in marriage are:
- Communicate Early: Is there a topic coming up soon that there needs to be agreement on? Maybe it is a relative coming into town or extra hours at work? Start talking about it ahead of time before the decision needs to be made. This takes the time stressor out of the equation and allows time to think calmly before making a decision.
- Identify Areas of Agreement: In the heat of the moment, it can be hard to find areas where you the two of you actually agree. But, before things get heated, get clear about what you’re trying to resolve and then brainstorm the possible solutions. More than likely, you will find at least one you both agree on.
- Manage Emotions: Many times, emotions spike and this leads to arguments. Take a time out from the conversation to identify your emotions and what triggered them. Knowing what gets you spun out can help both of you understand the situation better and lead to a more productive way of talking so you can finally reach a resolution you both can live with.
- Remove the ‘You’: A conversation can get heated quickly when a spouse feels backed into a corner. So, instead of making ‘you’ statements, try ‘I’ statements. For example, instead of ‘you made me mad’ try using ‘I get mad when this happen’, (not “when you do this”).
Are you ready to implement these simple tips in your marriage? If you found the tips above of value, you may get a lot more out of marriage coaching. I would love to be your marriage coach, give me a call at 919-924-0463 and let’s set up your free marriage consultation.