I still remember my client Sarah bouncing into my office claiming she had an epiphany. I said, “Great, what is it?” 

She said, “I’ve figured out that relationships aren’t natural.”

I smiled and replied, “Where did you get the idea they were?”

She is not alone in that thinking. 

To an extent, relationships are natural. But so is breathing and seeing. But things can get in the way of those being normal. A cold. Asthma. Near-sightedness. Glaucoma. 

Sometimes you’re aware of the problem and can wait it out, like a cold. Other times it might creep up on you slowly or you don’t realize what’s normal and so you aren’t aware of how bad it is. Like being born near-sighted. Because it’s the way you’ve always seen the world, you don’t know how fuzzy and out of focus things are.

Relationships can be like that too. You do what you know without realizing the consequences. And, because you don’t know anything different, you don’t know there can be anything better.

But every romantic relationship you’ve had before your marriage has ended. If you keep doing the same things you did in those relationships, how will you keep this one from the same fate?

3 Killer Mistakes You are Making as a Lover

3 Killer Mistakes You are Making as a Lover

How often do you think about your skill as a lover? Thinking about it too much can paralyze you. And thinking about it too little can result in frustration for your partner. Finding that sweet spot can mean the difference between just an “okay” sex life and a great...

How to Have Good Sex in a Long-Term Relationship

How to Have Good Sex in a Long-Term Relationship

No, you did not misread that. It is possible to keep your sex life going in top form through the years, no matter how old you are or how long you’ve been together. Unfortunately, sex, or lack thereof, is often a source of frustration and arguments in many marriages....

I know you tell yourself that you’re with someone new. And you’re correct that they bring different things to this relationship. But you are the same.

You still see this relationship through your lens. You still have the same emotional triggers. You still engage in the same habits and behaviors.

The relationship language you speak is still the same. The dialect may be different. But the outcome, if you’re not careful or educated, may be the same.

Your overall level of happiness in life is a function of how healthy and successful your relationships are. And your marriage is the most important one.

So what do you need to know or do differently to have a great marriage? What “natural” things about your relationship do you wish were better? What would your wife say?

There are skills and techniques that you can learn and implement to have the marriage you’ve always wanted. What would motivate you to get this knowledge?

If you want to excel at your marriage, then schedule a 5-Star Relationship Consultation today.

 

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DOES HAVING A GREAT RELATIONSHIP HAVE TO BE HARD?

One of my least favorite pieces of “advice” is that marriage takes a lot of hard work. No wonder marriage rates are at an all time low. Now this doesn’t mean people aren’t coupling up. And those relationships can be challenging if you don’t know what you’re doing. To be honest, that’s most of us. You will keep making the same mistakes, suffering heartache and wondering if happy, lasting relationships are even possible. The answer is a resounding “yes” according to Intimacy Expert and author Allana Pratt.

BAD MARRIAGE ADVICE #19: RELATIONSHIPS ARE NATURAL

To an extent they are. But so is breathing and digestion but these processes can sometimes be difficult. Learning how to handle the “not so ideal” times is the way to keep them happy and healthy.

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